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Mobile Phone Predictions

By Giovani Saintiny

Well, it's time to put on my fortune-teller's hat, dust off my crystal ball, and plant tongue firmly in cheek!

Let's face it, mobile phones are doing more and more all the time. So, the question is--where is this all headed? We've all heard the joke that these phones can do practically everything except make coffee. So, what do I see them doing in the . . . near(?) . . . future?

I'll take a stab at it!

-In the future, mobile phones will double as full-power microphones. Wrist-based phones will also be used as full-fledged amplifiers for guitars, and so on. They'll act as karaoke machines, displalying stationary mid-air holographic fields in which lyrics appear.

-Wrist-based mobile phones will be programmed to mask flatulance by producing retro-computer sounds and supposed alerts. Intellectual property right battles will promptly ensue.

-Wrist-based mobile phones will be able to create holographic fields that surround the wearer in what really looks like clothing, allowing nudists full freedom, at last. Watch out for wave ineterference and weak batteries, though.

-I'm definitely predicting that mobile phones will become something you wear on your wrist! And, in the future, by aiming them at your food, you'll be able to heat it. After all, microwave cooking is done via radio waves! Can't brew a cup of coffee, exactly (unless it's in one of those tea-bag-like affaires), but it will be able to reheat it.

-Phone calls will be free, but subsidized by advertising. And, the advertisers will know how to tap the brain's pleasure centers via manipulation of certain tones. These will be embedded into advertisements according to whether credit card information (readilly available) suggests one buys little or much of what's being advertised.

Well, it's not all bad--is it? And, best of all, there's a good chance it's absolutely wrong! ;o)

Contributed by Giovani on March 15, 2009, at 8:56 AM UTC.

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